It’s Saturday night late
and I’m in a hotel that happens to have a wedding reception going on this
evening.
It’s fun to see the happy
couple, all smiles, with their future bright and shiny in front of them.
And since their
revelry seems to have escaped the ballroom, it appears that I’m up for a bit
tonight.
My mind starts to
wander and I find myself smiling as I recall the day Bill and I got
married.
The thought popped
into my head that after Bill’s diagnosis, the last few years of our marriage
were like getting ready for an ‘Un-Wedding’, or our wedding but only in reverse.
For our wedding……..
|
For Bill’s
funeral…….
|
·
Had a long
engagement leading up to the wedding
|
·
Had a long
dis-engagement leading up to the funeral
|
·
He
popped the question
|
·
He got
the diagnosis / prognosis
|
·
Told our
friends and family
|
·
Told our
friends and family
|
·
Picked our
date
|
·
Waited
for the date
|
·
Picked our
flowers
|
·
Picked the flowers
|
·
Picked our
location
|
·
Picked the
funeral home
|
·
Picked our
wedding party
|
·
Picked his
pallbearers
|
·
Found
the minister
|
·
Found
the minister
|
·
Printed
invitations
|
·
Printed
memorials
|
·
Ran
announcement in paper
|
·
Ran
obituary in paper
|
·
Picked
our house to live in
|
·
Picked
his cemetery plot
|
·
Held wedding
/ reception
|
·
Held funeral
/ wake
|
·
Sent
thank you cards
|
·
Sent
thank you cards
|
·
Closed
individual accounts and opened joint accounts
|
·
Closed
joint accounts and opened individual accounts
|
· Being together then
|
·
Being separate now
|
I know how hard this
was for Bill and me to work through his prognosis, accept his dying, and plan for our separation. I
treasure that time.
And having treasured the end years, I cannot fathom the
pain you must go through if your spouse is taken from you suddenly, unexpectedly. Is the emotional pain is similar to being
left at the altar? You have burning questions
as to why, and know you will never see your spouse again in this lifetime so answers harder to find and accept?
My heart goes out to
all of us who have lost a spouse and are surviving in whatever the stage of
grief you find yourself in at this time.
We will get through
this with the help of our friends, some old, some new.
I wish you peace for now. Joy will return in time.
Copyright 2012. All rights reserved.
